Dead Memories
by The TableThrower
Summary: Summary inside, contains character death, suicide, and implied and stated sexual relationships between consenting women This should be read at a time where all characters are considered over or at the age of cosent


A/N: I do not ship this pairing, I am a through and through Katoph shipper with Tyzula on the side, but I did promise my friend Magic Basher54986 I would write this, so Magic this is for you XD

Disclaimer: I do not now nor will I ever own Avatar The Last Airbender. If I did, it would most certainly be Katoph that kiss in Lovers' Cave, and not Kataang. Katoph would be canon, Tyzula would be canon, and Smellerbee would have... a special someone created just for her. I also do not own the song this piece is based off, it belongs to the ever amazing Slipknot.

Summary: With her friends and her love dead, who does Katara really have left to turn to? She finds comfort and more in a place she never expected, with a person she hated to the ends of the Earth.

Dead Memories

_Sitting in the dark I can't forget_

_Even now I realize the times I'll never get_

_Another story of the bitter pills of fate_

_I can't go back again, I can't go back again_

Katara had no idea how long she wept, once she got free of the bonds that the Dai Lee a agents had placed her in, the earth prison that had been holding her retreating back into the ground. When she had ran into the antechamber of the Fire Palace, and found the broken and burned bodies of not just the Dai Lee but her friends and the one woman she loved more than any other being on this miserable planet. She had no idea how long she had wept, holding Toph's lifeless form in her arms, crying for the love they once shared, the dreams the duo had of the future that would never be. All of the time before the invasion in which they had set for hours under the light of the moon overhead, conversing silently, wrapped in the others arms. Their long talks about a white house somewhere in Taonon, a small city within the Earth Kingdom, Katara with a waterbending school and Toph winning tournament after tournament as the Blind Bandit. The little fluffy raccoon-dog that would nip at their heels as they came home, hand in hand after hard days at work. Gone, snuffed out in the blink of an eye, as was the life of the woman she now wept for, who's body was cradled to her chest with her permanently unseeing milky white eyes staring lifelessly up at her.

She hadn't felt it when two strong, yet slender arms wrapped around her waist, she hadn't felt it as they gently pried Toph from her arms, and yet again hadn't felt it as she had turned and wept, crying endlessly into the slender females shoulder for spirits knows how long. She spent the days inside the Fire Palace in a daze, sitting in the dark of her room and staring unseeingly at the walls. As much as she wanted to change things, go back in time and be there to take the hit or hits that had taken her love from her, she knew there was nothing she could do. She took her meals silently, not speaking even once, not as they handed her her meals, not as she quietly took them and ate, not as she stared at the walls of her room thinking only of Toph and the life they would never have. This would go on for months, Katara only ever leaving her chambers to bathe and use the facilities. Her host had come, revealing herself to be Katara's fiercest enemy, the Fire Nation princess Azula but it was not to mock, not to gloat, but to cry silently with Katara, a silent repent for her sins, sharing the burden of loss and grief, but not once revealing that she, Azula herself, had been the one to strike the blow that had taken the life of the woman that Katara had loved.

She never made a sound as she slipped in each night, silently watching as Katara wasted herself away, dreaming of the life that she would never be allowed to have, thanks to the fire princess herself. It wasn't long before things started to shift, gradually the tears stopped, as Azula had worked up the nerve to hold the woman of her dreams as she poured her soul out through her eyes. Those beautiful brown orbs that had captivated Azula had changed from being so full of life to the eyes of someone broken, defeated, and lost all will to continue. The holdings changed slowly, overtime in that dark room, a room of sorrow and pain. As the nights turned into weeks, the weeks to months, it shifted from Azula holding Katara as she cried at night, to crying with her, to them holding each other as they wept, to silent kisses of reassurance and silent caresses in the dark.

If you asked either woman, neither could or would tell you when it had turned to more, when they had first had sex. Neither really remembered it, starting as a kiss to ease the pain coursing through both womens' hearts, evolving into sins of the flesh to take the edge off even more. But it never changed, Katara never wished it was Azula, dreaming only of the love of her life above her, Azula not saying a word, allowing Katara her dreams of her love. The love whose life she had selfishly taken. No words ever spoken. The carnal and pleasure filled nights were never acknowledged, never spoken of. They never had to be.

With no words the communicated effortlessly, achieving a balance so rare, so unique, but yet so wrong. Each night, as the indulged in the activities to take the pain away from the other, one thought passed through Katara's head endlessly. '_Toph, soon... soon I will join you. Wait for me, please.' _For Azula it was simply '_Spirits... if you're out there, hear my plea. Deliver me to the pits of whatever evil place you deem fit. Allow me to suffer as she does.'_

_It was no surprise when Azula entered one day to find Katara dead in her bed, the first true smile she'd given since Toph's death spread across her face as she no doubt jointed the woman she loved in an embrace yet again. Azula had plead, the spirits had heard, and now... Well now she finally knew the extent of the pain through which Katara had suffered, forever unknowingly at Azula's own hand._

End

A/N: I'm sorry Magic, I tried and could not do a lemon. I don't feel that this turned out as well as it could have, far from it really, but it took a direction of it's own, not going as I had planned it in my head, as stories are prone to doing from time to time. I hope that you enjoyed this, as this one shot was written especially for you. I had to go way out of my comfort zone to write this, and I'm sorry if it's horribly OOC, but I just cannot write a convincing Azula. For Katara well... it took everything in me just to kill off Toph... writing this one shot was as hard for me as it must be for you to read it :(. But who knows, maybe some will actually like it. The lyrics and title are from the Slipknot song Dead Memories. An amazing song by an amazing band. In my heart, the 9 will never die. I'd like to hear thoughts, criticisms, flames, whatever you have for me, I'll gladly accept. I'm not proud of this piece, I feel it could be a lot better. Once I get through Dimension Detention, I may go back, rewrite this, and repost. Until next time, The TableThrower signing off.


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